Eye of the Mountain
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Writing about breaking into reality.
Essays, memoir and poetry on attention, grief, belonging and aliveness. What does it take to live beyond survival and projection? How do we move towards participation and thriving?
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Theme · Trauma
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Continue Here - The Arc of Becoming
How do you become a decent father when the one you had either wasn’t there or taught you all the wrong lessons? How do you become a steady, safe, encouraging presence for your children and community when you grew up with violence, neglect, mockery or abuse? How do you reclaim masculinity when the version you inherited wounded everyone it touched? How do…
Rock Bottom Has a Key Hole
Addresses the point at which effort, money, and familiar strategies stop producing change. Rock bottom becomes not a sealed floor but a lock whose key is embodied contact with pain, need, and reality.
The Role of a Mother
Defines mothering as the capacity to remain present with pain without abandoning, fixing, or becoming overwhelmed by it—and considers how that capacity is internalized.
The Blame Wrapper
Interprets narcissistic blame as armor built around unbearable childhood shame. Confidence and control form a polished outer castle whose accusations keep vulnerability, accountability, and grief from reaching the abandoned child inside.
The Frozen Scream
Investigates preverbal terror whose bodily evidence persists without a recoverable narrative. The frozen scream names an early survival state that organized vigilance, identity, and relationship long before conscious memory.
The 5 F's: Freeze, Fawn, Flee, Fight, Follow
We think of personality as fixed - “that’s just who I am.” But beneath lies a choreography of survival: five ancient instincts that shape how we move through love, conflict and belonging. Understanding them isn’t about pathology. It’s about reclaiming choice - the space between stimulus and response where our true self waits to dance.
Autobiographical Pieces
These are the stories that built me. They trace the long arc from childhood abuse and suicidal despair to awakening, meaning, and purpose. Each one is a milestone — a moment when I stopped surviving and started seeing. They aren’t just confessions, but maps: records of how pain becomes understanding, how shame becomes strength, and how truth, when spoken…
A Pariddle of Feral
Inside us live we have a hierarchy of creatures. This myth-poem is about captivity, ferality, and the parts of us that carry our souls to freedom.
Murder of Innocence
When I was twelve, two tiny pet rats taught me the truth about cruelty. This story is one of the hardest I’ve written, but it was also a turning point in how I began to understand my father — and myself.
Unfurling
Healing feels like trying to shape water — impossible, until you realize you can flow with it. This series is about the practices and metaphors that helped me turn trauma into movement, ritual and life.
Emotional Rape
Abuse doesn’t always leave bruises. The deepest scars I carry came from manipulation, gaslighting, and domination that no one could see. This is my attempt to name the tactics of invisible abuse so they lose their power.
The Weight
Trauma doesn’t just wound — it weighs. This is a litany of the heaviness I’ve carried, written not to collapse under it but to name it, so it can finally be set down.