Eye of the Mountain
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Writing about breaking into reality.
Essays, memoir and poetry on attention, grief, belonging and aliveness. What does it take to live beyond survival and projection? How do we move towards participation and thriving?
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Theme · Trauma
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Shock Collar
Condenses a history of abuse, adaptation, and recovery into a stark autobiographical inventory. The act of viewing the record without collapse demonstrates a new authority over memories that once controlled the nervous system remotely.
The Tragedy of My Life
Confronts the painful gap between finally seeing one’s life clearly and discovering that insight alone cannot restore what trauma, absence, and adaptation took away.
Worshiping Absence
Shows how trauma orients attention toward unavailable people, missing care, and imagined completion. The worship of absence preserves the original wound while making available life difficult to notice or receive.
Crossing the Desert
Describes the exposed middle of healing after survival strategies have been relinquished but no new identity or capacity has solidified. The desert measures progress precisely because there is no familiar shelter left.
The Practice of Imperfection
Uses an imperfect creative act to examine exposure, inherited judgment, and the practice of letting unfinished or flawed work be seen without turning against oneself.
The Practice of Being Seen
Traces the movement from performing specialness to tolerating accurate visibility. Being seen becomes a reciprocal practice of dropping spectacle, remaining present, and allowing ordinary reality to carry intimacy.
Rites of Initiation
Reads a life not as gradual progress but as a sequence of thresholds that ended one identity and made another possible. The piece gathers embodied, relational, and spiritual rites of passage into an autobiography of discontinuous becoming.
Melatonin Regrettably
Interprets sleeplessness as the return of needs ignored during the productive day. Night becomes the only quiet in which an inner child can protest neglect, making insomnia a relational message rather than merely a chemical problem.
The Alignment Model
Human suffering arises when our perception and nervous system fall out of alignment with reality. Pain signals this misalignment but our culture encourages avoidance through performance, stimulation and distraction. These strategies reduce perception and deepen the friction between ourselves and the world.
Dimensionality Reduction
Examines how trauma compresses a complex, multidimensional self into a narrow set of defensive reactions—and how embodiment restores lost range and choice.
Transparent and Legible
Explores the vulnerability of becoming readable to oneself and others after a life organized around concealment, shame, and protective opacity.
Constipained
Addresses neglected pain as an inner child whose unmet experience has become a chronic bodily contraction. Compassionate witnessing allows the body to stop bracing around what it once had to hold alone.