Piercing the Stone

Pain wants contact.

Are you weak because you got hurt?
Or did you get hurt because you were weak?
You don’t break where you are strong,
you break where you are weak.

The gentle violence of attending to discomfort
and leaning into pain slowly but decisively
can melt the biggest obstacles.
The same way the water cuts through rock.

I have found muscles in my spine
that have not moved for a lifetime.
And they hurt to access like a motherfucker.
And all they wanted was some touch.

I can guarantee you that inside of pain
there are unmapped areas.
And exploring them is worthwhile.

You don’t know how big they are from the outside.
Some of them might be bigger than your current world.

That’s right.
There may be more to perceive inside the discomfort
than there is outside.
Not even just what’s worth perceiving.
The total of what’s possible.

So these unmapped areas are worth exploring.
They can expand your world
like you didn’t think was possible.

You can find something there
that might reorganize your whole being.
In ways you didn’t know you were capable.

Running away from pain is one thing.
Staying with pain is another.
Going into pain is something else.
Contacting is the practice.

It can teach you to move more slowly
and gradually than anything else.
And learning that alone can make you more gentle
at the same time as making you more strong.

The finer the gradient you perceive
the more intelligently you’ll move.
The closer you can get.

And then you can get even closer than that.
That is the practice.
Find the homeopathic amount,
the minimum viable dose.

If you get close enough,
it will move.
If it doesn’t move,
move everything else around it.

Here’s a clue.
The unmapped areas are as large
as their ability to throw you out of balance.
The smaller they get,
the easier it is to maintain balance under stress.

Find the point where violence is so gentle,
it’s indistinguishable from love.